If you are looking to step up your seduction game then I highly recommend this book. One of the best books I have ever read on attraction and relationships is Models By Mark Manson. When it was published in 2011, it was one of the first books that was focused more on the emotional side of seduction rather than the logical.
Dating is not about being scummy and rude, instead, Mark tells guys to focus on getting a more appealing, honest individual, and getting within the insecurities which get in many men’s way. If you haven’t read it yet I highly recommend checking it out.
Here are the highlights of what is discussed in this book:
- Honest Communication: learn to be vulnerable is a major factor in successful datings, a good example Is embracing shame and your emotions
- Honest Actions: learn to overcome your fears and anxiety that are stopping you from the dating life you deserve
- Honest Living: by creating a fun lifestyle
In the era of social media, it seems nowadays everyone seems to think you need to be rich and famous to be considered physically attractive, but in reality, you ought to exhibit qualities which reveal high value, that will be signaled by your social standing and behavior, which is signaled by the way you act around other people, how others act about you, and most importantly the way you treat yourself.
Everyone likes to be desired, but because feminine stimulation is much more psychological than male stimulation, the feeling of”being desirable” is much stronger in ascertaining a woman being drawn to a guy. That is the reason why the more bodily assertiveness you pursue a girl with, the more aroused she becomes, even though she was not interested in you to start with.
Just how attractive a guy is, is proportional to his confidence & charm, only, being invested in different people’s perceptions of you than on your understanding of yourself.
Really the easiest & the best way to become a high value & really confident person is to be full in and invest in yourself. Learn that new skill you have been putting off, start going to the gym again, try out a new diet, travel, have your own adventures. All these things will also make you much more interesting which will lead to girls finding you more attractive. If you are on top of the food chain, you don’t have any reason to be vaccinated or to defer to other people (if you don’t wish to). If you are in the bottom of the food chain, your whole life will revolve around other people.”
Establish high personal standards and live by them, do not waste time with anybody who does not meet those criteria. This really goes for a casual or a serious relationship, it is crucial to understand exactly what you would like and exactly what you will set up with, and what you want. If somebody isn’t meeting those criteria, move on to the next. The last thing girls want is someone who will just go out with anybody.
Want to attract more high-quality women?
Then forget all the PUA’s advice or lines you’ve ever read.
there’s a much simpler trick – which is not even a trick.
All you need to attract women is honesty; and that’s true regardless of the type of women.
That all sounds nice and simple in theory but how do you really do that. Well for starters you can:
- Become aware of your emotions, motivations and life story.
As men we are often thought that having emotions is “unmanly” and that isn’t true. You need to be aware and cautious of your emotions.
- Taking the lead by sharing those emotions, motivations and life stories first.
Sharing first creates trust , what will happen most often is it will encourage her to open up and share herself in return and that is how you begin to create an emotional bond.
- Ideally, the more this goes on, the more personal the stories become and the deeper the emotions in which you connect with.
- What are your stories?
We all have stories about why we don’t take action when we are supposed to. “Oh imnot wearing the right clothes” or “ oh she wasn’t THAT attractive”. You need to recognize those and get them handled.
- Overcome anxiety
The first step is recognizing the pattern and understanding its root cause. Usually comes from our unwillingness to be vulnerable.
- Take Actions
Mark recommends you just embrace your fears and anxiety rather than trying to fight them anyways. Start small and build upon it. The best way to go about taking action is to start small and incrementally increase the difficulty of it.
Your first time doesn’t have to be a direct opener but you can just walk up to girls asking for directions. Keep doing that until it becomes normal and you feel numb to it. I.e have no difficulty doing it. Then you can go up asking for their opinions, the same thing again keep doing it until it becomes second nature and then just go give a compliment and build up from there.
If you get too many rejections you can ask one of your buddies to watch you and tell you what you are not seeing. It could be any one of those things:
-maybe you are presenting yourself badly or speaking very nervously
-maybe it’s the way you are dressed, are you groomed properly? Do you smell funny?
When in doubt on how to start a conversation with a woman, simply walk up and introduce yourself and explain to her that you wanted to meet her. Here is a plain and simple example:
“Hey this is kind of random but i thought you were cute and wanted to say hi”
What he recommends every man does is before he even begins talking to women is to sit down for a while and ask yourself some really important questions:
- What do you value in a woman?
Could it be Honesty? Affection? Intelligence? Curiosity? Similar interests? Education?
- Women with the traits that you value, where do they spend their free time? Where are you most likely to find them?
- What do you enjoy doing most? reading/writing? Do you play a physical sport or an instrument? What are events or organizations that you can become involved in that explore your hobbies?
How to become a very interesting person:
- Develop hobbies and a passion
- Always be trying on new things
- Have opinions you are not afraid of expressing– the easiest way to be interesting is to have an opinion one way or the other, and not worry about people being insulted by your opinion
- Have personal standards that you will not settle for less. Don’t be desperate, If you do not find a woman attractive, don’t waste your time and hers talking to her.
Mark is an author of 2 best-selling books “the subtle art of not giving a f*ck” and “everything is f*cked” that have been sold more than 13 million times worldwide. He has been published and featured in about 50 different newspapers, magazines, tv/ radio shows.
He also has spoken at some of the biggest firms like Google, Microsoft, Linkedin, and the likes. On top of all that Mark has spoken at some of the best universities in the states, places like the University of Utah and Southern California and the University of Texas in Austin.
If you need some help with your dating life and are looking to step up i seriously recommend getting and reading this book. Don’t forget, more importantly, is taking the actions Mark tells the reader to take in the book.